While at first glance it may appear that happiness lies in obtaining our selfish desires, we are actually happiest and most fulfilled when we are sacrificing for something bigger than ourselves: something worth sacrificing for. In fact the so-called spiritual crisis afflicting the West and the epidemic of depression that is following in its wake merely reflect the fact that we have run out of Big Ideas worth sacrificing for.
From Forbes Magazine
I was spending time with someone recently about some of what we’re doing to help Parkcrest recognize that they are a people who live all of their life on mission. As we were talking, this guy asked me, “do you feel like people need to reach a certain point of maturity before they realize this and live on mission?”
My first reaction and response was to say, “no”. We processed my immediate response some then, but now after having time to process it more since then, I’m still convinced that was the right answer.
Maturity doesn’t precede living on mission. Maturity is developed while living on mission.
Jesus doesn’t send out his disciples when they’re ready, they learn to be ready by being sent out. The 72 know very little about preaching the Kingdom and casting out demons when they’re sent out to do that. Peter takes on launching the movement of the church, not long after he has denied Christ – he matures while he’s leading out on mission. Paul preached for 3 weeks in Thessalonica before leaving and a church getting established there.
It seems that those who spend their time focused on trying to become mature, never end up living out the mission of Jesus, and really by definition never then become mature. But those who pursue the mission of Jesus have to develop maturity in order to carry it out.
Maybe one of the most important things that we can do as leaders is to call people towards mission and then help those who are leaning in towards it to develop maturity along the way.
I think it’s interesting that when David is King of Israel and needs a commander for his army, he doesn’t ask who has the most experience, or who is the best fighter. He simply says this, “Whoever leads the attack on the Jebusites will become commander-in-chief.” The kind of maturity that was needed to lead the army was displayed by the person who would go up in front first – the one who would be on the front lines of the battle.
I’m all for helping people develop in maturity in their relationship with Christ. In fact, in a few weeks, we’re going to be launching an exciting spiritual formation process for Parkcrest. But those processes help people who are living on mission to mature. Without living on mission, without being someone who steps up and gets on the front lines, the process of maturity doesn’t mean much.
So first, live your life focused on living out the mission of Jesus, and then allow your growth and maturity process to follow that.
After our message on marriage this weekend and our offer of the Free Wedding Weekend, this was passed along to me today. I was shocked to find that it seems that even the Huffington Post is willing to admit that at least for some, cohabitation is a bad idea (although with all the arguments that she cites, I’m not totally sure how she ends up with some).
Here’s a few quotes pulled out of the article:
So what’s so wrong with living with your boyfriend or girlfriend? Let’s forget the studies pointing out the booze (cohabitors drink more), weight (they’re heavier) and happiness (they’re not quite as happy as married couples but they aren’t more miserable, either), because those aren’t the issues. Nor are the results of the latest NMP study, “Why Marriage Matters,” which predicts doom and gloom for the children of cohabiting couples. The NMP has an agenda; it wants to promote marriage. Still, even a recent and presumably agenda-less Pew Study finds similar results, at least when it comes to cohabiting couples’ economic well-being; they’re poorer, and that puts stress on a relationship. A lot of stress…
The real problem with cohabiting is that many couples who enter into it don’t give it a lot of thought; it’s one of those “just kind of happened” things. You like him, he likes you and a few months later you’re jamming your stuff into his closets…
Commitment is a decision. And if cohabitation is being offered as a replacement to marriage — as theAlternatives to Marriage Project and many sociologists and family psychologists see it — then a little more thought about it needs to happen, especially if you know you want to have kids one day.
(read the whole thing here)